Successful leaders know that it is inherently easier to get what you want when you can manage your emotions and personality. A positive mental attitude will provide more options when matching your emotions to a given set of circumstances.
Many let the circumstances of the day dictate which emotions they will display regardless of the outcome they want. For example, when getting stuck in traffic, a person may choose to become angry and frustrated. Then another external situation presents itself and promotes another emotional response. One external circumstance to another dictates emotional responses.
Conversely, others recognize that circumstances occur, and they choose their emotional response. For example, they may get into a traffic snarl and rather than going with the anger and frustration that naturally occurs, they choose to reframe their situation mentally. Their emotional strength overcomes the external stimulus and allows their mind to go to a more positive and productive state.
Successful leaders know that they alone control their own attitude toward events. They strengthen their emotions so the best possible choice can be more readily recognized and deployed if they want to consistently get what they want. A positive mental attitude strengthens one’s ability to create positive results.
First, we must realize that some people enjoy having a negative attitude. We must shift conversations with negative people to positive things or ignore their negativity. Words like “can’t, never, always, every time, everything” can serve as communication cues that the successful leader can recognize and reroute with questions and statements such as, “What stops us? What would happen if we did? I have felt that way before, but I looked around and this is what I found.” These statements and others may be able to shift attention away from negativity and toward solutions.
Second, we must minimize the impact of external events on our internal well-being. An event in our life has no meaning until we assign one to it. For example, your 15-year-old son carelessly spills milk on the table vs. your five-year-old grandson doing the same. We instantly can assign different meanings to these similar situations. Surely, there are external events that rightly bring sadness to our lives. Successful leaders manage their attitudes to deal with such events without losing sight of their outcome. They strive to “happen to life” vs. having “life happen to them.”
Third, we must be better managers of our internal dialog. Successful leaders practice positive affirmations daily that remind them that they have value, are important, needed, are kind and considerate. They work on listening well and ask questions. They use positive internal dialog to move them closer to rather than further from what they want.
Lastly, successful leaders conquer their mornings by being thankful and grateful for opportunities. A good attitude is truly a treasure. It will help you remain cautious in times of great success and insightful in times of failure.
About the author: Alan R. Crnko is an Alliance Safety Council board member and business consultant in the Baton Rouge, LA, area. He has spent his career providing workforce development services. He can be contacted at alancrnko@gmail.com.
